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Feeling Guilty

July 6th, 2012 at 02:16 pm

I'm going to 'fess up here...I feel guilty spending money on luxuries. I like a bargain, but I like nice things as well.

DH is retired. We are blessed he has a nice pension and Social Security. I work full time and have a good job and benefits.

We just returned from an 8 day trip to Philadelphia, New York, Boston, and Niagara Falls. It was with a church group on a bus. Our hotels and tours were paid for, as well as some of the meals. We had saved the money and paid cash for everything except for one expenditure of $20. We had cash left over from the trip and put it back in the bank. DH bought a tie in Boston -- hence the $20 charge because they were closing down the register and didn't want cash. He bought 3 ties for $10 in NYC. I bought 4 packages of tea in Boston as a souvenir for friends (read less than $10) and postcards in each major city. We had a nice time and I'm glad we don't owe any money other than the $20.

Once a month we have massages. I rationalize them that they seem to help my arthritis. I don't see a chiropractor, but I do know I feel a lot better after. DH says the same thing. It is paid in cash each month.

I spend money on fruits and vegetables when I grocery shop. Very little ever goes to waste because we eat at home quite a bit. I try to hit bargains on other things.

I collect Blue Willow dishes. I did buy a couple of items and put them on the credit card, but I pay the credit card off every month.

Sometimes I look at the money we spend and feel guilty. I don't need Blue Willow dishes. I'm sure I could make it without the massages. As for the trip, life would go on without it. I validate the buying of fresh fruits and vegetables because I think it keeps me healthy. I only missed work this year because I had food poisoning, not from my food.

We have friends who constantly spend on things. They tell us they deserve these things. He draws a larger pension than DH. His home is not paid for. For years, when he worked, he made far more money than DH and I did put together. He bought a bigger house, a fancier car, and more things. His home is filled with them. He bought fancy jewelry for his wife. And the quest continues for buying more, more, more.

A few years ago we paid off our home. It was a goal that we had -- we intended to pay off the house before DH retired. His mom died and with the selling of her property (shared with his brother) we paid off the remainder of our home. We then used the money we didn't need for the house payment to pay off a vehicle. So, we didn't owe much money and started saving money. Then we could take a big trip like we did this year.

I cut corners whenever I can. I use coupons on the things we would normally buy; I make a lot of things from scratch. We buy used whenever we can. We pay cash for everyday items so we aren't tempted to overspend. If I do use the credit card, it is paid off as soon as the bill comes.

I still feel guilty when we do spend money, but I guess it could be called a guilty pleasure. Perhaps saving up for things is one of the reasons we save...but sometimes it is difficult to spend that hard earned money!

3 Responses to “Feeling Guilty”

  1. momcents Says:

    Funny, the timing of your post and the call I just had with my husband. Today I am looking at a used couch and love seat that I foung on craigslist. Took two weeks of emailing back and forth to come up with a time to see it (I used my mom's computer, so my mom has been dealing with the particulars). Anyhow, it is $500 for two Ethan Allen pieces in a style and colors that I love. I am holding out high hopes for this (the home is for sale so I've essentially seen their whole house - furniture wise - and everything is beautiful).

    My mom is giving me $200 toward the $500 purchase. It is $300 out of pocket and I was hemming and hawing a bit to husband. I was fretting, I spent a lot of money yesterday (which I had budgeted for), and I have a tuition payment looming and braces, etc, etc.

    DH said, "Don't feel guilty. It will a huge upgrade to what we have." My present furniture isn't falling apart and has several more years of life left in it. Why do I need this furniture? I don't. I want it. And I feel guilty.

    Your trip sounds like a lovely time, and I like that you found things you like (ties and tea and postcards) that were affordable! And everyone deserves small luxuries every now and then, not full-time indulges continually, but massages and Blue Willow dishes are lovely things that brighten our days!

  2. Ima saver Says:

    You sound a lot like me. I don't like spending money either on "stuff" But sometimes, I splurge a little. I have had every house we have owned, paid for in full with no house payments, since I was 32 years old.

  3. rob62521 Says:

    Momcents...sounds like a "steal" on that furniture. I agree, sometimes you have to treat yourself. Let's just feel guilty together, eh?

    Ima, you are an inspiration!

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